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Hello all you die hard Killers out there. It was Arbor Day recently, and although it has come and gone, it has made us here at Killer Shade stop, sit and take a moment to ponder the meaning of trees a bit. As many of you may be aware, trees are our dirty little competitors. Sure they create oxygen, shade children and protect them from the dangers of the skin, and generally beautify our world, but the fact is they are still competitors and we will just come out and say it: Killer Shade lead time 2-6 weeks- depending on project Tree lead time- 30 years Don’t be fooled by their leafy exterior and promise of shade!! They will promise you the world and just when you finally grow them and start to depend on them they catch fire and kill you and your family. You can do better!! Help us and do your part by cutting down a tree and buying some Killer Shade. God bless.
We've grown so much this past month there's just not enough space to show every mug shot of every new employee we hired. So here you have it, our new badass team members. If a list just ain't cuttin' for you, view the bios for some naughty pictures and info! Read at your own risk. PHOENIX NEVADA
This month we're moochin' for a dozen Sprinkles Cupcakes. What's with all the Sprinkles hype?? We really want to know!! We're counting on all you devoted Killer fans to help us out! Send cupcakes to Killer Shade Headquarters attention: April's (but our crap was late so actually May's) Mooch. Kisses.
Have you read it? Bookmarked it? Commented on it? Get at it already!
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SHADE OF THE MONTH Christopher Walken Edition
Project Name Architect/Client: Unique Challenges: Movie Tie-in: (His plan was eventually foiled at a local parade with some crazy hijinks from his pals Otter, Boone, and Bluto) Something we overheard from Mr. Walken: Chris is an old family friend…see what he says about us?
Next Month... ~By Mike Boyle
"We may not be cheap, but at least we're arrogant" Got your own Killer Thought? Bring it on. If we like it, we'll give you top Killer Thought billing on our home page for the next month, applaud you with a "we are not worthy" article in our next newsletter, send you a commemorative roll of Killer Shade toilet paper and then we'll forever claim your Killer Thought as our own in our sacred bank of Killer Thoughts. Submit your own Killer Thought. ***Disclaimer: Ridicule possible if you suck!
We know you do and we'll just keep on asking 'til you give them up! Do we have to remind you that we are too cheap to advertise and too lazy to find shadey projects all on our own- so here is your chance to be Killer and hook us up. If you have anything, give us a ring or just drop our main man Vince Zuckerman at vincez@killershade.com |
IN THE NEWS AND BRAGGING ABOUT IT TheBuzz Blog by Chad Graham, Arizona Republic At work, drink it if you got it. Here's the funniest recruitment video The Buzz has seen in a long time. Phoenix-based Killer Shade, which designs and manufactures shade structures for commercial use, has a video on its Web site featuring its ‘shade whisperer,' a guy named Mike “El Guapo” Boyle. He talks about working for the company — while mixing what looks like a rum and Coke. Other off-beat perks of working at Killer Shade, according to the site: -"Foosball schedule — 9am, 11:45am and 2 pm Monday thru Friday. Bring it!!!” -"Party schedule — about every month depending on how frisky we are feelin …” “Last but now least, employee beatings down a staggering 37% this year.” The company must be doing something right. It just expanded into the Las Vegas market to take advantage of the commercial real estate market, which appears to be much stronger than residential real estate at the moment.
Who’s got the "sexiest" bio?
The Killer Polls are officially open and we need your votes today! You've heard us brag about how our Killer Team is made up of some of the best talent around! Who knew all it would take to create such a rockin’ team would be to hire a few emotional cripples, a hand full of drunks, and a suspect pygmy (DNA results not yet in)? Being an equal opportunity employer has truly paid off! But now it's your turn to weigh in. We want you to tell us which one of our rockin' team members has got the "Sexiest" bio on killershade.com ? Note: "Sexiest" is in the eye of the beholder. Read sexy bios and cast your vote now! Your vote does count and will make a difference. Winner will be featured in our next edition with accompanying black mail pictures of course! . We are Killer Shade and we approve this message.
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